How to be Who You Are, Against All Odds, Pt 6 - Closure

In this final post, I just want to touch on some last thoughts I have on the subject, and kick your butt a bit to motivate you into fixing the only thing you can fix - yourself.


This series is part of an extensive essay I wrote to explain theraputic methods I have myself used and have taught to my friends. I think a lot of people out there have no idea what they really want or who they really are, because we have all been trained so long to follow the herd and trends and authority. Those walls need to be broken back down so that your true self can grow and flourish, and you can find true happiness from within yourself.
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Stop. Making. Excuses. If you've gotten this far and worked through all of the prior posts, and you are still making excuses why you can't or won't follow your heart, then you are relying on old habits and trying to stay safe. It's ok. You may not yet be ready to unleash your full potential, but DO NOT STOP trying. Continue to journal and work through things and when the time is right, the world had better look out because you're going to rock it. There is a time and a place for everything, and all of the universe has an ebb and flow to it. Your time will come, but it is up to you to prepare for that time.

But I don't want to hear any excuses. I can't tell you how many excuses I hear ALL THE TIME, that grow ever tiring because they are just a repeat of the same thing over and over...

I can't change my life, I have kids! You can't do that with kids!
I can't let (insert person name) down, they would be so upset.
I don't have the money to make any changes.
I've already done this for this long, if I stop now everyone will get mad.
I'm too tired/exhausted/busy. (this is evidence you NEED to make changes)
And so on.

There are prominent bloggers who changed their lives even though they had kids or had to go against their families wishes or who were in horrible debt or who cast off society all together or who thought they would never escape the life they had lived. Nothing is impossible, we only tell ourselves that to relieve ourselves of the responsibility to make a change.

Let me say that again.

An excuse is a way to relieve yourself of responsibility. You make excuses to yourself more than you do to anyone else, because an excuse stops you from feeling like a failure. If you make an excuse and never try, you may not feel like a failure but you sure as hell are NOT going to feel like a winner, either.


Instead of making excuses, just admit the truth to yourself. "I am not ready for this now. I want it, but I have to work on it slowly." Even better - the truth you admit to yourself may something you can address. It may be "I am afraid to step outside of what I've always known" - that can be addressed so that you CAN step outside of the world you've known. After all, if you are even considering it then deep down you want a change.


There is something incredibly cleansing in speaking the truth, even if it is only aloud to yourself. Tell the truth, not an excuse. After all, the truth will set you free.



In closing...

The reason that these techniques work is because in the human mind, if something is not spoken aloud, written down, witness or known to anyone other than you, it is in essence NOT REAL. You can push it around, avoid it, ignore it, stomp on it, pretend you don't hear it, stick your fingers in your ears and swear to GOD that you were thinking about flower arranging not "that thing", and you can completely get away with it. No one else knows, so it is your thing to believe or NOT believe.

When you sit down and write down that thing it is real. You see the words with your eyes, you feel the pen in your hand (which is why I personally prefer to actually write on paper), you can smell that faint smell of ink on the paper, hell you can ball it up and chew it if you want. The point is you can no longer escape the truth. This is therapy in the form of facing your demons and figuring out how to conquer them, instead of hiding from them your whole life.

I don't know what you want, because only you know that. What I can tell you is what I want - I want to be free. Free from fear, from lies, from stress, from heartache, from processing memories that are painful over and over because I shut down every time I start. I don't want to get to the point where I'm crying those gut-wrenching-barely-able-to-breath-beet-red-face tears over "nothing". I don't want to carry around ghosts anymore, hoping they never show themselves in the light of day to the people around me.

I want to be able to focus on my creativity and growth, to encourage the small seedling within me to grow into a great giant redwood tree that is unmistakable and impossible to hide.

And, I want all of that for you, too. I want you to be happy, to be content, to feel completely at ease in your skin and in your soul. It won't be easy getting there, and it's not going to be all kittens and pancakes once you're there either. I think I've stated several times "ITS GOING TO HURT. LIKE HELL. BURN BABY BURN!" or something like that. But I've also repeatedly said its utterly, completely, absolutely, "yelling-"I'm Free"-from-the-hilltops" WORTH IT.


I wish you all the best in the future and in your self discovery!

How to be Who You Are, Against All Odds, Pt 5 - Permission, Naysayers, Fear

This series is part of an extensive essay I wrote to explain theraputic methods I have myself used and have taught to my friends. I think a lot of people out there have no idea what they really want or who they really are, because we have all been trained so long to follow the herd and trends and authority. Those walls need to be broken back down so that your true self can grow and flourish, and you can find true happiness from within yourself.
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Permission to Embark

I'm giving you permission. You have every right on God's Green Earth to be the person you were meant to be. Why? Because you were born to be this person. God designed you this way, you chose this life, and here you are. Attempting to fight how you really feel every day will do NOTHING but make you miserable and will make the people around you miserable by proxy. Love yourself for who you are because you are the only person who will always be there, who will always love you and who will do your best to keep you safe. No one can understand you better than you understand yourself, so NO ONE deserves to tell you how to live your life. Don't feel like you have to impress people or meet their expectations, they do not have a right to impose such things upon you. While I do believe you should set your own goals and constantly work to improve yourself in areas you feel are important, this process is not something that should ever be dictated by anyone else. This is YOUR life. You are the only one who has to live with yourself at the end of the day, so do what makes YOU feel good, productive, healthy and happy. Be the best you that you can be, for yourself and no one else.



The Naysayers

No matter what path you choose in life, SOMEONE is going to disagree with you. The path that you choose is really only differentiated by how many people disagree with you and how loud they are about it. It is quite likely that in order for you to lead a happy life, you will defy the people you care about and possibly estrange them. Bottom line - if they cannot be supportive of your decisions then they do not have your best interests at heart. You can still love them, but I suggest you do it from afar. Don't let what they say get to you, it is their own fear talking. Fear of something different, fear of losing you, fear of their lifestyle being "wrong" if they admit that yours is OK. Some people will never accept you but remember that the only person whose acceptance you NEED is your own, and if you cannot accept yourself because you are playing by other people's rules, you are going to stay unhappy.



Fear

We all have it. That tiny voice that tells you that you're taking too many risks, that you should just be part of the crowd, that safe is best, and that maybe, just maybe, you've gone completely insane. Shut. It. Down. Argue with it if it helps (and it may). Make it your mission to debate with that voice rather than to automatically do what it says. That voice wants the safest way out. It doesn't understand that you absolutely have to be unsafe in order to grow. It doesn't want to grow, because growth isn't safe. Sure, you could stay the little seed inside the seed pod for the rest of your life, and there is no chance you'd ever get mowed down by a lawnmower if you did that. But you'd also never see the sun, feel the rain, or feel alive. The risk is worth it. It is always worth it. One of the biggest motivations of the little voice in your head is fear of loss - loss of your life, your possessions, your very mind. The little voice is fear - and fear should never motivate what you do in life. Fear is what makes women stay with abusive men, makes politicians push the little red button, makes people hoard and stay indoors all the time, it stops people from living their lives and it causes tragedies. Let it go. Realize that you will be afraid - but like the pain you feel, the only way to make it stop is to walk through the fire and out to the other side. You cannot go around, dig a hole to china or just hide behind it. You must walk through, and the fire will burn like hell, but it will burn away the weakest parts of you.

Fear will play into your life in another way - the fear from others. If you do the impossible, people will be afraid of you. Why? They are afraid it makes them weak, means that they have to do it too, afraid that they aren't capable, afraid they are wrong, afraid their entire life has been a lie. And, sadly, in many cases it has. Anyone who goes through life acting on other people's beliefs and rules is living a false life. There is a difference between finding someone who believes things that you know in your heart to be true and banding together, and following the herd because... well, it's what people do. If someone reacts to the changes you are making with anger, hatred or negativity, understand that they do so not because something is wrong with you but because something is wrong with them. Something in their hearts has echoed what you've said or done, and scared the shit out of them.

After all, if they've followed the stupid rules all their lives, why the hell don't you have to?


Next Post: Closure

How to be Who You Are, Against All Odds, Pt 4 - Accepting Yourself

Photo: What we keep hidden


This series is part of an extensive essay I wrote to explain theraputic methods I have myself used and have taught to my friends. I think a lot of people out there have no idea what they really want or who they really are, because we have all been trained so long to follow the herd and trends and authority. Those walls need to be broken back down so that your true self can grow and flourish, and you can find true happiness from within yourself.
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Most people do not realize how much we all have in common with each other. This lack of understanding between humans leads to fear of rejection and a lot of hiding in the corner. The fact is, other people are afraid of things, have desires they feel aren't met, have places they want to go and dreams that are unfulfilled. They have self esteem issues too, self image issues, and most people feel like there is at least one person whose expectations they haven't lived up to and whose opinion they value. Everyone has fallen, everyone has sinned, everyone has done something bad and has a guilty secret they'd prefer that no one knows. We've all screwed up, hurt other peoples feelings (even when we didn't mean to) and done things that we regret. There are a lot of people you probably think are great who have done something they think is absolutely horrible to someone else. NO ONE escapes from this and the people who claim they have absolutely no regrets and aren't ashamed of anything they've ever done are lying. Everyone is fallible and everyone has doubts about something.

First things first - allow yourself to understand and accept the things you have done that make you feel like a bad person. Allow them to come to the surface, do not hide from them. Yes, it may make you feel crappy but the next step should help - address each one (in a journal will help as well) and examine it. Determine your base motives for what you did (a lesson comes later as to how to do this) and accept responsibility. Say or write to yourself - yes I did this, it was not an ok action to take but I did so, it was my action and I am responsible for it. I regret that it happened but I cannot change that it happened as the past is gone. I absolve myself from further guilt stemming from this action, carrying the guilt harms no one other than myself.

Once you have sat down and recognized an action/fault, accepted responsibility and knowledge of your wrongdoing, and then FORGIVEN yourself for it, you can let it go. There is no need for this to hang in the back of your mind any longer. You've forgiven yourself, which is almost as good as erasing the past. There is one more thing you can do, and that is to confess this secret to someone. it does not have to be in person, it can be online, a note to dear abbey, even an email to me. I can assure you that emails I receive will be read, possibly responded to in a kind manner, and then will be deleted and what has been said will never be shared or thought about further. It is not my business to judge you, I only wish to provide a gentle shoulder to help you with your burdens.

It will take time, but if you continually work through the guilt and things that plague you, eventually it will be mostly gone and you'll be much freer than you have ever felt. This will give you a clean slate, and instead of going into new relationships, friendships, occupations, etc with a guilty conscience you can go in as a free being who has nothing to hide because you understand that the past is gone, it cannot be changed, and who you WERE is not who you ARE.


Next Post: Permission, Naysayers, Fear

How to be Who You Are, Against All Odds, Pt 3 - Defining your needs, wants, loves and desires

Photo: Leaving a Mark

This series is part of an extensive essay I wrote to explain theraputic methods I have myself used and have taught to my friends. I think a lot of people out there have no idea what they really want or who they really are, because we have all been trained so long to follow the herd and trends and authority. Those walls need to be broken back down so that your true self can grow and flourish, and you can find true happiness from within yourself.
__________________________________________________



Don't deny yourself your true feelings. Acting on them may or may not be necessary, but what is absolutely necessary is admitting to yourself that you have them. It is the only way to make a decision on what to do about them and clear the playing field.

When working on what you desire and really want, journaling again is a great way to help yourself out. Write down desires, don't be afraid to write the deepest darkest ones, and as doubts surface making you feel fearful or embarrassed, write them down too. Try to pinpoint why you feel that what you want is not for you to have, down to something that was said to you or taught to you, or something that is generally not accepted in society. Make your way to the source. Examine the source. Pick it apart. Write how you feel about the source honestly. Is it someone/something you genuinely trust and love, or is it an authoritarian figure in your life you feel obligated to listen to?

If it is society - you don't have to listen to them.
If it family - you don't have to listen to them.
If it is friends - you don't have to listen to them.
If it is your boss - you don't have to listen to them.
If it is the government - you don't have to listen to them.

Not listening to any of the above parties has consequences. Most likely, those consequences are why you have avoided breaking the rules and following your heart. Think about what the consequences are... write them down. Are they so terrible? In some cases, I'm sure that they will be. If your deepest desire is to kill someone, I don't reccommend "trying it out" as the consequences are life threatening... and personally I feel that act is immoral. However, much of the time you will find that the consequences you are hiding from aren't all that bad. If you're going to make someone angry, they will get over it in time. If it will alienate your family, do you really want them in your life if they can't let you be who you are? After all they were there when you were young and had some part in making you who you are. Are you afraid of disappointing someone? Their disappointment is their own - they should not have held expectations over your head for you to fit their idea of you. If you won't be accepted as part of the crowd anymore - one, do you want to be part of a crowd if you have to wear a mask all the time? That cannot make you happy. two - you'll find a new crowd, and if you're being yourself it will be a crowd who appreciates you for who. you. are.

So the challenge is to weigh the action and the consequence objectively. Remember that you are weighing your right to be who you are against your will to please others. If you follow your will to please others, it is the only part of you that will be real and not fake.


Next Post: Accepting Yourself

Circles in the Sand

Crop circles. Intensely controversial, used for advertising, of debatable origin and meaning, a subject which occupies my brain occasionally.

It should come as no surprise when I say crop circles have always fascinated me. It seemed like there was a big boon in interest in them in the late 90's early 2000's, but for at least six or seven years now I have heard very little about them. When the public eye became less focused on them the circles seemed to pick up the pace and intensify in their design intricacy and imagery. I picked the subject back up about a year or two ago and found that the simpler circles and lines that I had known before had become amazing and highly involved images including birds, jellyfish, owls, and dragonflies.

When crop circles were much simpler the explanations were easy - they were manmade, diseased crops, even hedgehogs mating (that's not a joke) but now they have grown so complex that explanations are much harder to believe. The vast number of circles that show up every year include both manmade and questionable origins. There are times it is blatantly obvious when a circle is manmade, particularly when it is advertising a product or event. There is also the difference in the crop itself - it has been found that some circles are made by pressing down the crops (manmade) and some are made by a means that makes the plant "grow" in the new direction rather than just lay down. Supposedly there has also been some type of leftover energy at these sites but how provable that is, I don't know.

If you are interested in seeing recent crop circles (or all of them for the last many decades) check out http://www.cropcircle-archive.com - they have both photos and digital drawings of most if not all of the circles that have happened.


Like with most things, I think that we have no way of knowing the real answer, and that makes the questions the important piece here. Having an open ended puzzle like this gives us the opportunity to explore possibilities and imagine solutions in a limitless way. We can formulate and examine numerous theories and, essentially, be imaginative. The same way we can be about all of outer space... because we don't know what's out there.

In a way, the unknown breeds hope. We don't know what is out there or what may come, but we have the opportunity to believe that it will be beneficial and beautiful. We can consider the possibilities freely and in any light which we chose.

I myself have moved around through several theories regarding crop circles, and I don't view any as more or less likely than the others. They are just possibilities and I'm not trying to prove any of them right or wrong. They are floating out there, adding to the quality of our collective imaginations.


My theories include that the earth itself is sentient and this is it's language, that something underground was placed quite some time ago that has been causing these "signals" that are spelling something out which we do not understand, that somewhere far away is a race that has the ability to cause this to happen on earth and is trying to contact us (and will know we are able to comprehend their contact only when we figure the circles out and respond).

I may talk about each of these further in future posts, but this post is just about considering the possibilities - it's your turn.

What do you think they are?

The Point

By understanding the author you can better understand their words. So, I'm going to talk about myself a lot today. I promise after this we'll get back to the good stuff.


Why do I occasinally have wild lists, misspellings, weird use of grammar and frequent tangents?
I write the way I speak and the way I think. I even do quite a bit of editing on my posts, and in many cases an "error" is still here because I liked it. I like quirks. I like odd use of language. Like hearing a foreign accent, it piques my curiosity and makes me listen more. I also talk fast, especially when I'm excited about something. I can't possibly count how many times I've said something and had someone look dazed afterwards, asking me to repeat. Slowly.

This blog does exactly what it should do - it reflects my personality rather than perfection. I'm not about perfection. I'm about truth.


The one, single, most important thing you should know about my writing - I am the queen of the run-on-sentence. Unabashedly and unashamed I throw run-on-sentences about willy-nilly as if they want to parade their pretty new dresses that are composed of words, words, some commas, more words, possibly even a semi-colon that makes it look almost gramatically correct. Then, finally, the period (and deep breath) you've been waiting for appears.

I don't know why. Much of what I say doesn't feel right to me if I break it up too much... most likely because it was a strand of thought in my head and I want it to stay that way on paper. So instead I use emphasis and ellipses frequently. If you hate run-on-sentences, or you plan to read my writing aloud to yourself, you've been warned.

[if you don't know what an ellipsis is, please open a new tab, type it in your google search box and read the wiki. this is what I do every time I see something I don't understand or know enough about to satisfy my personal quota for understanding the context of what I am reading. you'd be surprised at the amazing things you can discover]


What Am I like?
I occasionally reflect on posts that I have written and realize that the post itself makes me sound like one person, whereas another post makes me sound different. So I wanted to explain what everything becomes when you put it all together in one head...

My brain is a well filled but disorganized place. I have to organize the world around me carefully in order to keep track of everything. I often jump from subject to subject in my train of thought, and I have a very bad habit of interupting people mid sentence because I suddenly thought of something I felt was amazing. My humor is kind of off, that is to say that many times I talk about something I thought was incredibly funny (or crack a joke I thought would be hilarious) and I'm met with crickets. Or the "needle being dragged off the record" sound. Sometimes people actually play these sounds from their cell phones while staring at me in that "I want you to know how un-funny I think you are" kind of way.

Ok. They don't do the sound effects. But they look at me that way all the same.

I am a fantastic problem solver. My thinking does not follow a linear path. By linear, I am refering to the way that I think everyone else thinks based on the way they talk their way through logic. I talk my way through logic in a completely different way. In fact, some times it's so round about that I just jump from point A to point D without even touching B or C.

A door opens in front of you. Through it you see another door. You walk through the first door, open the second, and see a third. You open it and I'm standing there because I noticed a hallway that goes out around and didn't require passing through people's bedrooms. You cheeky monkey.

Not you personally. It's just an example. Unless you'd walk through people's bedrooms without first looking for the hallway. You cheeky monkey.

I've deliberately written this whole post very much in the way I would be speaking to someone while hanging out and just having a conversation. I've tried to inject some of this into my recent posts as well. My goal is to merge my mental writing more with my actual writing, basically infusing more of my personality into my posts.





Why does this blog explore so much varied content and switch back and forth between very broad scientific stuff to very personal self help stuff? It isn't very cohesive, what is your point?

I am not by any means a daily blog writer, in fact most of my posts are composed ahead of time, 7 or more at a time, then scheduled in advance. In fact, this post was written three or four days ago and scheduled. Mind warp! I'm talking to the future! Doc! Doc Brown! Can you hear me?

Curse me and my tangenty ways.

Back to the point.
This blog may touch on a myriad of subjects and go to territories both familiar and unfamiliar, but everything really is unified into a single purpose.

I want you to ask questions. Question yourself, question life, question what you've been taught, question science, question religion, question authority, question your way of life, question whether there are tiny pink elephants hiding in some deep part of the rainforest we've never found.

But Ri, you may say, what is the point of questioning everything? Granted questioning everything is a point but it must lead to a greater point, right?

Of course. I hadn't thought of that. Until I just typed it. (did that sound like Shatner in your head as you read it? It should have. Read it again.)

The initial point is for you to question everything, and the point of doing THAT is to bring you to realization. One realization, fifty realizations, three realizations, whatever happens for you is up to you. But what will most definitely happen is that you will have a new perspective on the world, yourself, and who knows what else. All of this though, has yet another point. > _ <


Ok this is it! The end all-be all point of what I do!
I want to help people grow. Flourish, flower, blossom, become more than you are right now.


It is my belief that we are alive for the singular reason of growth. As we have experience here, we grow. That growth translates to an increased growth in the universe, which means as we as people have experiences, the universe grows. Like a child in the womb, it started as a tiny speck and is ever growing to some bigger, greater, and completely different thing.

In fact, this is one of the few beliefs I hold dear which never changes. It is my core belief. It is to me, the purpose of life and existance - to continually grow, change, evolve, learn, and become more than you already are. I believe this to be an unending process - and cyclical - it's one of the basic truths of life itself.

EVERYTHING is cyclical. The planet spins, the universe spins, the seasons change in cycles, human life goes in cycles, the planet experiences cycles, the stock market experiences cycles, trends come in cycles, population comes in cycles, civilization comes in cycles. Even the very thing that has everyone on edge right now is affected by a cycle - radiation. First of all, the way reactors work involves a cycle. Second, radiation goes through a much slower cycle in that it takes quite a long time for it to dissipate (half life). Third, the fact that the radiation is making it's way around the world is thanks to the cycles of weather and wind that wrap the globe.


So that is it. My point. Helping you to grow so that we all can grow, so that existance itself can be improved.

My methods for achieving this range from gentle guidance to help your soul heal to kick-in-the-ass reality changing questions, to sharing my unique perspective in hopes that it will make you consider your own. I do this all with love - because I genuinely and truely love everyone on this planet, even if people infuriate me. A Lot. But I know that that comes from them not understanding as much about existance as I do and being caught in cycles of life from which they cannot escape without help.

I have my own cycles that I experience. I write because I suddenly get a need to do so, then the need is fulfilled and will rest until it builds and rises again. Same with painting. I paint because I must and it comes in cycles. I am driven by forces I cannot name to do the things that I do. The part of this that is pickling my brain is that some serial killers say the same thing...about killing.




So here is my kick-ass question of the day: (I've decided that throwing these in randomly could be fun.)
Is it possible that serial killers were designed to kill because what they do causes waves of change in our mentalities and causes us to experience pain - pain which will inevitably cause us to grow? Does that mean they are right to do it?

I know my answer. I want to hear yours.

How to be Who You Are, Against All Odds, Pt 2 - Clear out old baggage

You didn't cause it, you didn't want it, stop carrying it around!

Photo: Ghosts

This series is part of an extensive essay I wrote to explain theraputic methods I have myself used and have taught to my friends. I think a lot of people out there have no idea what they really want or who they really are, because we have all been trained so long to follow the herd and trends and authority. Those walls need to be broken back down so that your true self can grow and flourish, and you can find true happiness from within yourself.
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Journal. Journal, journal, journal, journal. I cannot say it enough. If you don't want to directly write the events down, think about them and put it into poetry. Think about them (to the point you are overcome and may cry) and paint. Talk to yourself and discuss it aloud. Yes, I'm telling you to answer yourself. It's ok. You aren't crazy.

In this case, if you feel you are carrying baggage (and you most likely are), try to assess how that baggage is showing up in your life. Are you pushing people away? Drinking? Baggage manifests itself in many ways and the most well known is that you treat a current relationship a specific way because of a past relationship. If you got cheated on, you may suspect this person will cheat on you and you try to prevent it or find out if it has happened - without them having actually cheated on you or even done something to indicate they would. This means that when you were hurt before, you bottled up your emotions and your fear and kept it hidden somewhere because dealing with it was too painful and you stopped the process by hiding in something - drugs, alcohol, sex, food, shopping, reckless behavior, anything else with a pleasure response that can be addicting. When you stop the process, you hang in limbo. The limbo goes by the name of whatever damage was done to you, and until you fully work through the feelings surrounding that damage, you can neither heal it nor escape from it. Anyone you get close to will feel the impact of it, and it can (and often does) cause a repeat cycle of the same relationship problems over and over and over, making you wonder why all the people you date treat you the same crappy way.

Where you are in your head dictates what kind of people you draw to you. If you are subconsciously seeking commiseration, then that is what you'll find. If you subconsciously feel you aren't worthy of being treated well then you will find people who treat you badly. If you're trying to drown yourself in sex, then you will find like minded individuals and even though you may consciously think you want a serious relationship, the only signals you are going to put out are ones that draw people who are looking for the quick fix, not love. If you meet people who do not serve or share the needs going on in your head, you won't connect with them and may even dislike them. Or, sometimes in a sub-consciously self loathing way you will dislike people who feel and act the same way you do.

Allowing your mind to continue the same pattern will cause your life to continue the same pattern. It's not any external piece that needs fixed, it's in your head.



Next Post - Defining your needs, wants, loves and desires.

It's All a Big Misunderstanding

Millions of humans have walked the earth before us. Some of them left little messages, some left big messages, some left little more than their remains.

We have not met these people, we do not speak the same language as they did, we have completely different cultures and ways of learning about the world around us.


Why do we assume that in ANY way we can interpret what they were saying? I don't have a problem with us attempting to understand our predecessors, I have a problem with the assumption we've got it figured out.

For example, take the Rosetta Stone. It was a hugely important discovery as it linked hieroglyphic texts to texts in other languages in a way that we could say "oooo! So THAT is what those hieroglyphics meant!" That's fantastic - an amazing discovery that shed some rays of light on ancient Egyptians lives.

But, as usual I have to raise my hand and say "Whoa! Why do you assume that this is all there is to know about their language?" The Rosetta stone has explained what some of their glyphs mean, has shown us that some glyphs are used as a standalone thought and some form words and phrases, and that many of them are treated differently from others. This is all very good work and incredibly useful, but you cannot sit back on your heels at that point and say "We've translated all the texts, we have a nice clear picture of what they were saying, and we're done!"

One of the biggest fallacies of mankind is to assume that when we've figured something out we automatically know all there is to know about it. There is always more to it and most of it we may never know.

Add that to all the other stuff that we know about the history of this planet and the conclusion is that we're brilliant, we know it all, and we're WAY smarter than they were.

I'm not buying it.

This may be a rehash of prior posts, but this is a subject that I feel is very important to drive home to the public. We do not know JACK about the past. Sure there are bits and pieces and we link them together to form a picture that makes the most simplistic sense we can, but it in no way accounts for all possibilities and certainly does not exclude any possibility.

So... science cannot prove that anything DIDN'T happen. They can barely prove that anything DID happen (and as far as I am concerned, they can't.)


Skepticism towards religion is extremely common. I know that when I talk about it I am largely preaching to the choir on that subject. Whether someone is devoted to their own religion but skeptical about others or is skeptical about every religion... or only skeptical about Scientology because L Ron Hubbard said there was great money to be made in religion and then... surprise! The therapy he suggested somehow decides it deserves religion status...

I'm digressing. Just call me "Tangent Girl".

Anyway, we are all kinds of skeptical about religion but not science. Oh no, we accept that shit as FACT, baby! They know way more than I do, with their fancy words and big equations. How can I, a non-college educated** woman of simple means contradict big fancy equations?

Equations are math. Math is a creation of Man. Man is imperfect.

I'm not saying science* doesn't do good work. They do. Some incredible things have come from science, and so much of our daily life is filled with the benefits of our scientific advances. Great things come from science. Their knowledge is incomplete and they are basing theories on theories which have been proven to work but do not necessarily represent the complete picture. And in most cases, scientists are fully aware of that, but it isn't necessarily conveyed as the information reaches the public. It also may not always be considered when new theories are based on existing "proven" theories.

It comes down to a factor of variables. In some situations we can control the variables, such as creating a vacuum and adding only gasses that we choose, trying to light a flame and finding if there is no oxygen in the included gasses that it will not light. This proves that fire requires a fuel, commonly in the form of oxygen. For things like the physics of gravity, space, and the exploration of history through archaeology, there can be any number of variables we are not aware of. These variables being unknown means that our knowledge is incomplete.


Conclusion: Our ancestors have spoken to us, but without knowing the context or even the full translation of the language, we cannot fully understand what they have said. There are things which are and may always be lost in translation which prevent us from fully comprehending our past. Additionally, it also means that what we know about our world, our bodies and our universe will always be limited by our ability to know the variables and rule them out as we work on discovering what there is to know.


Super simple conclusion: We can prove nothing to be absolute fact. Period. The pyramids could have been built by an interstellar travelling band of carnies for their three ring show.








*I'm including all branches, particularly archaeology. Science is essentially "the study of _________", as referenced by the "ology" in the name. Humerously, that means "scientology" is "the study of science". It doesn't really relate to what they do though, I think it's just a fancy smart-sounding name. Fancy.


**I don't feel formal education as proved by a piece of paper is worth a whole lot. I have known an extensive number of college students. I know what the vast majority do and how they view their "time in college". There is something to be said for taking a variety of classes that introduce you to new concepts you had not previously considered and that improve your vocabulary and ability to express yourself. College does not make one intelligent, what it does do is teach people method and knowledge and standard practice, all of which they could learn by other means if so inclined. This is especially true with the availibility of knowledge on the internet.

How to be Who You Are, Against All Odds, Pt 1 - Figure out who you really are

There is more going on in your head than you know - here is how to bring it to the surface.


This series is part of an extensive essay I wrote to explain theraputic methods I have myself used and have taught to my friends. I think a lot of people out there have no idea what they really want or who they really are, because we have all been trained so long to follow the herd and trends and authority. Those walls need to be broken back down so that your true self can grow and flourish, and you can find true happiness from within yourself.
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I went through a very difficult period in my life when my marriage ended. In two years every part of my life became uncertain - my livelihood, where I would live, who I would be with, even basic transportation became a concern at one point. I had all of these layers to my life like an onion (or an ogre! lol) and they were peeled back one at a time. I faced having to move into a place alone (which I had never done), potentially losing my job, potentially not having a car, potentially dying (I had to have surgery), even being lonely (which I was quite a lot). These events, this peeling away at everything that I had built up to make me feel safe and secure; it forced the raw parts to be exposed. It forced me to be real with myself about who I am, what I want, and what I need. I learned what my motivations were for the things that I had done and I learned that I am incredibly strong.

You don't have to go through a traumatic event to begin this process. Just beginning the process and working through it is traumatic enough - but completely worth it! Your number one tool is a journal. I don't care if it is a fancy moleskein, a standard spiral notebook, or notepad on your computer. It doesn't matter how you put this to language it just matters that you DO. Things will appear on the page (or come out of your mouth) that you didn't even KNOW that you FELT inside. When you are upset or angry or just feel the need to express yourself, sit down and write whatever comes to mind. Don't worry that anyone will see it, you can immediately destroy it if need be. The therapy here is not "having" what you have written but the act of writing it. The brain and psyche process a lot of data all of the time, and most of it doesn't make it to the forefront of our minds. We hear some of our thoughts as we are thinking them, but there are a multitude of other processes going on behind those thoughts. When you begin to voice or write down those thoughts and ask yourself questions about them, you can bring the processes hiding in the dark behind them to light.

The brain is an organ that has both tangible and intangible processes going on. There are pulses of light moving from nerve to nerve, communicating between them and moving information around. I believe that we do have a soul, and I believe that the soul is the intangible process that happens in the "brain" - the thoughts and feelings that lie behind the thoughts and feelings that we are aware of. Our minds are extremely complex, the thoughts that we are keenly aware of are in the shallow end of the pool but there is much more do it than we can see from here. Somewhere within that swirling mass of knowledge, thought, feeling, instinct, reaction, memory, DNA memory and ethereal being strands tie together and form connections, and where those connections knot together the thickest is where the part of you that you recognize as being YOU lives.

It's a "can't see the forest for the trees" type of situation - we recognize only what is immediately in front of our face and getting our attention. Someone may not be in front of us waving their arms, but that doesn't mean they aren't there, somewhere.

So as you write and question yourself and write more, you will find yourself coming to realizations you hadn't suspected. Things you didn't know that you felt will come out on paper and sometimes may be surprising. The process will bring tears, anger, frustration, sadness, loneliness, joy, relief, unburdening, fear, exhaustion and any other number of emotions. Do not let the outpouring of emotions frighten you - this is perfectly natural and the stronger they are the more likely that you've held them back and been in denial about them for a long time. Letting these emotions come out and be expressed and felt (IE: It's going to hurt) is how you work through them. Your emotions appear when things happen, and like a toxin in your blood stream they have to be processed in order to be neutralized. Most people do not have the knowledge or skills of how to deal with their emotions and bottle things up they don't even know they felt. Those emotions will build up and get angry, and they will bubble to the surface when you least expect it. This is what causes people to lash out or cry for "no reason" or just find themselves in a horrible mood one day. They cause lasting depression and anxiety, they encourage your fears to have more control over you, and they will rule your life and your decisions whether you want them to or not.

Process your emotions. Imagine you have an in box and an out box in your head, things happen in your life to add to the in box and you have to react and feel the emotions to those events in order to move them to the out box. If you don't, the in box gets so full that the stack of papers falls over and they go everywhere, causing an even bigger mess. Our minds do not maintain themselves fully, it requires active participation on your part to pull pent up emotions out of the abyss, feel them fully, and release them to the universe. In time, this becomes something that is more automatic and you may find yourself more healthily expressing your emotions as they happen, allowing you to release them immediately rather than hold on to anything.


Next post: Clearing out Old Baggage. You didn't cause it, you didn't want it, so get rid of it!

Human Hibernation

Most of us live in a climate that has cyclical seasons. Summer is a time of heat and fun, being outdoors and enjoying fruit, getting lots of exercise and generally feeling good. Fall brings on changing leaves and with it a chill and a beautiful melancholy. Winter arrives and brings barren trees and snow, blistering winds and a desire to be sheltered as much as possible. Finally spring breaks the cold, melts away the snow and fills the trees with fresh new buds.


The possibility that humans adapted to this ever changing flow is quite probable. Humans lived in temperate regions even in stone ages - anyone descended from those early peoples is going to have a digestive system that is trained to exist within the boundary of those seasons.

In summer, everything was availible - meat, fruit, vegetables, nuts, berries. Early man could have his pick of the abundance and probably ate a good bit of meat. Fall would come and animals would start to fatten in anticipation of their hibernation, and for early man potatoes and starchier ground vegetables would come availible as the above ground fruit and vegetables were disappearing. Early man would have to make it through the winter mostly on what he could eat in fall and what he could hunt over winter, plus a few hardy plants that last over winter like those starches, some berries, apples, etc. Biologically it made sense that man would need to increase his fat stores before winter just as other animals were doing - food would become scarce and temperatures would drop, and having a thicker layer of fat on the body is a natural solution to both of those problems.

As evolution progressed, our bodies would have evolved to gain weight when winter was coming - and one of the better indicators for our body was the types of food we were eating as we had nothing but what was seasonally avalible. When fall arrived, humans ate starchier foods - which turned on insulin and caused the body to begin storing fat rather than burning it. Insulin shuts off the body's fat burning and it also begins to store sugar (and carbs) as fat. Eating sugar or carbohydrates triggers the pancreas to release insulin in several doses the last of which lasts for hours. Eating starches at every meal causes us to continuously have insluin in our system and to not burn the calories we have stored.

When winter finally arrived, early man was fattened up and ready with his extra warmth and stores of energy. As winter progressed, he could occasionally find more starches and winter fruits to keep up on said stores - every time he consumed starches it would shut down the consumption of his stored energy and start the engine of storing any excess from what he ate in those hours. With fewer animals to hunt (as most were hibernating), early man had less food availible in general. He slept far more hours of the day (as nature intended) because winter brought longer nights and shorter days with it. So in a mass effort to conserve energy, man has adapted to gain weight when eating foods availible right before and during winter and to sleep longer during the winter.

Upon the arrival of spring, animals come out of hiding and are in a bit of a frenzy over mating, so they are very availible and hunting commences. After the long winter, early man probably gorges himself on a variety of meats and as the temperature warms and he consumes mostly meats, his extra layer of winter fat disappears. Into spring he goes, eating meat and readily availible leafy greens, spring gives way to summer and he enjoys some fruits and lots of sun, and the cycle begins again.

It is all of the above that leads me to believe that modern humans who decended from humans adapted to a temperate climate share the same metabolic quality - consumption of starches causes fat storage to begin, fat burning to end, and tells our body it is time to put on our winter coat of fat. Consumption of meat and leafy greens and no starches tells our body it is time to lose that winter coat of fat and become a strong virile hunter again. Consumption of some meat, some leafy greens, some fruits tells our body we are in our ideal state, food is abundant and can be enjoyed but neither fat gain or fat loss is necessary - our maintenance state.

Not everyone has ancesters who evolved in this manner. Those who can trace their origins back to tropical climates will likely have a different metabolic setup.

Our bodies are impressive biological machines that we do not fully understand yet - in fact we may understand them far less than we think.